Things I'm Excited About

Skinny people - or people in general who are not obese - take a lot of things for granted. They have no idea what it is like to go through life as an obese person. Few things irritate me more than listening to a person with a perfectly healthy weight and body type complain about their weight and/or body.

Here are some things that I am looking forward to experiencing with a normal-sized body.

• Hugging my husband without my belly getting in the way (same for slow dancing).
• Sleeping without a CPap.
• Sliding into a booth at a restaurant without worrying that I won't fit.
• Buckling my seat belt on an airplane without having to ask for an extension.
• Lowering the tray table on said airplane.
• Picking something off the floor while buckled into the seat belt on a plane or in the car.
• Being carried by my husband.
• Fitting into an assigned seat at a theater or stadium.
• Holding my laptop on my lap.
• Holding my kids on my lap.
• Trying on clothes.
• Crossing my legs.
• Holding my hands in my lap instead of my arms crossed over my belly.
• Helping my kids ride their bikes.
• Wearing a cute bra.
• Feeling comfortable in a swimming suit (is that even possible?).
• Going out with the women in my family and not feeling like the ugly duckling.
• Not being tired all the time.
• Riding all the rides at Disneyland (except Magic Mountain, it makes me nauseous).
• Being a better example for my daughter.

Here are some things I'm worried about (not necessarily in this order).

• Losing my hair.
• Dying during surgery (I'm terrified of not waking up from anesthesia).
• Being awake during surgery, but not able to let the doctors know I can feel everything.
• Looking older and wizened (more wrinkles).
• Excessive saggy skin.
• Looking in the mirror and not recognizing myself.
• Being thirsty. (I drink a lot of water and that will have to stop.)
• Insomnia (some people suffer from this after the surgery).
• Not losing weight despite the surgery.
• Gaining the weight back.

I'm sure I'll come back and add to these lists from time to time.